11 Stages Of A Love Story In Engineering Colleges Of Bengal
- Breaking Ice and all limits of ‘dhop’!!
‘Madhhomiker por aar ami boyi khuley dekhi ni, jointer aagey kichhu porlom na, baba amakey bolchilo porey bochor aar ektu bhalo rank korley Durgapur NIT peye jabi, aami boley diyechi aami drop korbo na’
‘ekdom theek korechis, last year amar mashir cheley Heritagey peyechey Computer Science, meso bolechey boley jaye ni, eyi bar dhukechey B.P.Poddar ECE niye, ki labh ta holo!!’
- Taking the Bullet!!
The girl has a boyfriend back in Techno India Kolkata, one year senior. Our protagonist though shattered, has nerves of steel, and takes it with a smile, does not give up and braces himself for a rather long and brutal battle!!
- Best friend first – The deal is on!!
He downgrades from Gold Flake King Size to Flake – ‘Counter deebi amakey bnara’, but goes out with her every evening, puts up gallons of his all-time favorite ‘Brut’deo, issues books from library, shares borrowed notes – ‘baba tui chinta koris na, HOD songey amar kotha hoye geychey, aami xerox korey tokey diye debo’!!
- And friends can go to hell!!
‘tora na sotti, bo*****dar moton kotha bolisna, or Boyfriend achey re bnara Kolkata te, o shudhu amar bhalo bondhomi!!’
- Fierce Protector!!
♂Boy: ‘Aami kintu or bada-badi sob ekbarey ses korey debo, ekhon cheeney na to amakey, podhtey eschey ebar mostani!! Tumi kintu amakey next time kotha boltey debey, tomakey kichhu bolley aami eder gushti ses korey debo maayer-dibbi kheye bolchi!! – he makes sure he punches a mirror in the boys washroom of college during peak lunch hours!!
♀Girl: ‘na, motei na, tomakey majhkhaney portey hobey na, aami theek sambhliye nebo, tumi oder moton bodmas na ki, ora to shudhu baba-mader taka noshto kora dhaandaye thakey sob din mataal gulo, kono din to pora-shona korey ni!!
- Airtel/Vodafone/Reliance/Tata Indicom
Yes!! Even though since he escorts her all the way to the girls hostel before he rushes back to his own for dinner which is over by then and he hence has to go to bed hungry, the first thing he asks when he calls her is ‘khawa hoye geychey tor??’, he knows every fucking airtel to airtel local, airtel to airtel STD, airtel to vodafone, vodafone to airtel plan – he has them all by heart!!
Chick’s fling with dada back at Kolkata has turned sour in the meanwhile, and our Hero plays Counselor every time her relationship hits rough waters, he knows very well the shoulder he’s giving for her to cry is soon gonna get a love bite!! Hence he’s in no hurry to play his card – ‘dekh, etatey kintu puro tor bhool, long distance soja bepaar na ki, tui okey trust na korley ki korey hobey bol to!!’
The folklore of his sacrifices and selfless love has by now bored his friends to death, hence they empathize – ‘le**ra tokey amra aageyi sabdhan korechi oyi meyer chokkorey porisna, tokey shudhu use korchey, bnara bos ekhaney chup korey aar mod kha, g***d mariye to aar labh neyi, chala to re Linkin Park, gaan suni ektu!!’
- Theek bolchis bnara, g***d mariye aar labh neyi!!
Our Hero has played the good Samaritan for quite some time now, and it’s time to go for the kill!! So he slashes his writs, ingests some sleeping pills and gets hospitalized, Bingo!! Hell yeah, overnight he’s the Hero of girl’s hostel, who unlike our Hero’s friends, are far more sensitive and take it upon themselves to convince our princess – ‘bokami koris na, er theke bhalo cheley tui kono din pabi na, koto bhalo basey tokey, eto din kichhu bollo na, aar kono cheley thakley tokey use kortey parto!!’ And that was for our Hero’s friends, who all are frowning by now – ‘kh**kir cheley haath ketey nilo oyi meyer chokkorey!!’ Who the fuck cares now though, our Hero has nailed it!!
- Maa- Baba!!
The protagonists of our story had already met each other’s’ parents on Howrah/Sealdah Railway Stations, back when they were ‘bondhu-bondhumi’ itself, since commuting to home town together was a pact too even then!! Now Girl’s Hostel awaits eagerly the formal announcement – ‘Maa-Baba ke janiye diyechi aami, bollo bes theek achey tora pora ses korey degree niye bhalo chakri peye ja, amader kono objection neyi’!!Yipee, partyyyyy……….!!
It’s down to business now for the first time, entire batch is up against the administration for not being able to conduct adequate on-campus drives, our sweet couple have by now completely forgotten the 1st year’s tall claims of ranks in Joints that had them missing Jadavpur/Shibpur merely by a whisker and our Hero is occasionally heard saying ‘Swurey baachha sob bhengey debo, amar baba amakey dui laakh taka donation diye eyi collegey bhorti korechey eyi jonney je aami college thekey ekta chakriyo na niye berotey paari??’ Anyway, as fate had it all the way for our Hero, after all his friends, mataal gulo, bodmas gulo, he too finally gets a job in an MNC, calls up his mom and is delighted to hear her teasing him ‘Songeeta ke bol aami baba ke niye jachhi or baari or maa-babar songey kotha boltey!!’
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- 11 Stages Of A Love Story In Engineering Colleges Of Bengal - August 27, 2016